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Goodbye everyone.   
10:56pm 13/06/2006
 
mood: lonely
music: Bush-Glycerine
Well, this is the last entry I will be making. I, as Praetorian1x4, will no longer exist. Due to recent events, I see no reason to stay with Live Journal and take up space that could be used by people who actaully use Live Journal for its designated purpose.
That said, all those who don't like reading long text may say their goodbyes and exit. I wish all of you who have been my LJ friends a very warm goodbye and good luck to all that life seems to throw in our directions, Isaac Mikhail Cajka.
P.S. One last video link before I go: It combines my love for soccer, techno and annoying voices.
http://www.metacafe.com/watch/138262/crazy_frog/
byes,
Isaac
---
I will explain in detail a bit later as to why I am leaving LJ but for now, I need to get some things off my heavy heart. I can only really say that I am glad that Sierra has fianlly made up her mind and followed what is in her heart. By leaving me, she has opened a new door for her life, a door that I hope that she can walk through with her head high and be proud to be who she is. As the person who still loves her, I can only hope that she succedes where her other relationships have failed, and that she finds love greater than mine in the arms of another woman who truely deserves her heart. I am greatly saddened to my very heart by her leaving me, but she is leaving for all the right reasons. She is off to find herself and live her life without worrying about being bi or hetero or homosexual. I can rest knowing that she is on a new lease of life. Not many of us can say the same or have the same opportunities to make a new beginning. I hope she does not squander this wonderful new gift in her life.
As for me, I can only fondly remember the times we shared. I perhaps will never love the smae way as I have for Sierra. No, this is not the writings of an obessesed ex-boyfriend, I am not that base or shallow. I still love her and will always will in some fashion or other but I always will. I will be there for her and be her friend but that will have to happen later, when I am ready to make that step. As for now..I do not know but I will continue to live my life as I mean to. I will not be on LJ as I came to this place through Sierra and it would be too hard for me to come here everyday and nto think about her as a friend. It will be some time before I can talk to her. Not out of anger or bitter resenentment but out of my own need to cope with the situation. I do not want to end up as some crazy-guy-ex-boyfriend. I want to be a mature, respectful and responsible friend to Sierra and I can not do that if I constantly think of her in the manner that I do when we were together. It would not be fair to her or her feelings.
I wish to end this post with my warm good bye to Panda_Bot, who was kind enough to be my friend here in LJ as well as Cassidy.
My best wishes to you, Sierra. I guess I won't see you at Edinboro after all.
One last video before I go:It combines my love for soccer, techno and annoying voices.
http://www.metacafe.com/watch/138262/crazy_frog/
Goodbye.
Isaac Mikhail Cajka.		  
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